When your beloved dog bites your child

As part of a series, I asked other women in my life (close and far away) to participate as a guest blogger on the topic #messyperfectlife. In each experience, there is a piece of both. The duality of those is what keeps us learning and growing. Sometimes messy is dominant and sometimes perfect is dominant, but it's always a blend.

Each guest blogger has tackled this topic in their own way--and that is perfect! They are discussing their life moments, glimpses of the successes and failures and more. It's a village, and there is so much power is sharing.

Find the entire #messyperfectlife collection here.

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Life was going pretty damn good, dare I say perfect, until one fateful day in August.

I should have known that the moment you state that in public (or even in the privacy of your own home, to yourself while you are getting ready in the morning) that karma would come up and say “NOT SO FAST”!

I should have known, but I went and thought it anyway.

What happened to turn life upside down? Well, you see I have a 4 year old who LOVES to give hugs and our dog was often the recipient of said hugs.

We constantly had to remind her and her sister that Max* (name changed to protect the innocent) is old (10 human years/75 dog years) and that he hurts (fatty tumors, arthritis and hip issues) and that he might not like big hugs and little girl faces right up next to his.

Well, during one of her epic dog hugs, our much-loved, elderly dog bit our very loving 4-year-old.

Emergency Room and doctor visits

It was bad enough to take us on a trip to the emergency room to get her some stitches. In an instant our #messyperfectlife was a whole lot more messy and nowhere near the perfect I thought it was.

When we left the emergency room after meeting with the sheriff’s deputy for the dog bite, we thought we would be on our way to healing with little miss E. However, a day later we were back in the doctor’s office having her wound looked at.

Naturally it was infected…badly.

More powerful meds and another traumatic experience later we were left with a 4-year-old that was bandaged up more than the original time.

According to my husband, who has been a real champ calming the fears of three girls,

(mine, my oldest daughter and our 4-year-old), this second appointment didn’t go as well.

No numbing, no sedation and lots of screaming. So much so that he thinks any child in a 300 foot radius might be scared to go to that doctor.

What made this situation even more heart breaking for us loyal dog owners is that Max had to be reported. Max’s loyalty for us and our family has never wavered and we never questioned him and the girls playing together.

Faithful Observer

Max was always our faithful observer. When the girls were babies rocking in their swings, he was the one letting us know when one of the girls would start crying.

He knew when one of us was sad and would offer his head on our lap for petting just to make us feel better. (It always did).

My husband and I would talk about Max’s care often. Knowing he was considered elderly and the fact that he has fatty tumors, arthritis and hip issues, we knew that we would have to make some serious adult decisions about Max’s care and treatment, and how much and to what lengths we would go to prolong his life/keep his quality of life from sliding.

Having had that conversation didn't make the situation easier. We NEVER expected to have that conversation surface to the front because he bit one of the girls.

But we knew what we have to do.

Adult Decisions

Separately we made the decision to put Max down the minute our daughter was bit, but it took a whole lot of mental and emotional processing to come to terms with our decision, and that my friend, was not easy!

I was eight months pregnant and the whole situation was stressful enough, but with my emotions on a defcon 4 status, it was worse way worse!! I cried more those last few days than I thought imaginable.

The idea that I had to be a grown up and do a grown up thing and then have to explain it to two very emotional little girls still gets me every.single.time!! In fact, I still cry about it.

My husband and I made the decision to not tell the girls we were putting him down. It may have seemed selfish to lie and say he just died but it is easier for a 7 and 4 year old to understand.

Eventually when they get older we will tell them the truth if they ask. None of the decisions regarding the (dog biting/putting him down) situation were easy. We are not the only parents and dog owners to make these types of decisions so we know we are not alone.

Some of the people we asked had varying opinions and we changed our minds constantly. Even the day we did it. We waffled in our decision. We didn’t want to, but we had to. For him, for us, for our girls.

It’s a tough job being an adult, parent and dog owner.

The Love of a Pet

We still find ourselves missing our beloved dog.

All four of us are still healing, and it hits us all at different times. Last Sunday we were sitting in church when our 4-year-old looks up at me and said, "I miss Max." It took all I had to not cry because I miss him too.

There are so many decisions you have to make as parents and you second guess yourself constantly and hope to God that you have made the right ones. In the end my husband and I know we made the right decisions by putting our dog down.

Our hearts are broken, but life is messy like that. We have our memories and to remind us how perfect it truly is.

Katie is a working mom of three girls. She loves spending time with her husband and girls, updating/decorating their home and visiting family and friends.

#messyperfectlife